Sailor Moon and Huxley
by Total epic Sailor Minion
Summary: Sailor Moon (English dub version) and Pilot and Huxley (if you've heard of them) meet in this ultimately hilarious (the ultimate hilarity comes later) crossover fan-fiction. Please R&R so I can continue this funny thing! I've got loads of hilarity up my sleeve! Rated K for use of 'fire-trucking' and 'shiitake mushrooms' as euphemisms for other words!


**Disclaimer: There are no characters that are mine in this fanfic.**

••••••

"Wulp, we're good now, so wadda we do?" I ask. Everyone looks at me like I'm a total idiot, especially the person who actually IS a total idiot.

"We, um…do stuff?" Neflite replies, quite uncertainly. "Duh." He sounds more certain. I can tell that he's not.

"Eat food!" Serena cheers. She sounds like a little annoying…brat, to put it lightly.

"Oh," Jedite starts. "I don't know how to do that!" His voice is more sarcastic than when I asked Neflite if he was gonna poison Sailor Moon with lemonade. *evil grin*

"Of course we know how to eat! We've got mouths!" Malachite yells.

"Hey, he was being sarcastic! Sar-CAS-tic: marked by or given to using irony to mock or to convey contempt." Mina says. I'm surprised that she even knows the word.

"Bananas are food! Not hats!" Lita says.

"Neflite's wearing a banana peel! BWAHAHAHAHA!" I can't resist laughing! Too funny!

"I read the dictionary! What's contempt?" Mina!

"Contempt is basically disregard," Amy and Malachite say.

"Jinx! You both owe me a soda!" Serena sings.

"Soda?" I ask, sarcastically. Maybe even Serena heard the sarcasm in my voice.

DING-A-LING! DING-A-LING!

"Ya? Hi, Pilot," Serena answers her 'phone.' A light murmur. "Can I bring my friends, too?" More murmurs. "Thanks, bye!"

"Who the heck is Pilot?" I ask. Stupid question. A person in the world. Duh.

"A friend of Darien! He asked me to come to his house, so I asked him if I could bring my friends!" she replies. "You can come, too!"

"You count us as 'friends?!' You're so naïve! You hardly know us!" Jedite's surprised. So'm I.

"Darien's friends are my friends, too!" Ho, boy.

[SCENE CHANGE: PILOT'S HOUSE] "Check it out, guys! I opened a portal to another world!" A black-haired kid who must be Pilot opens his wardrobe and there's a hole in it that leads to…a bedroom.

"Dude. You just knocked a hole into your parent's bedroom," a kid with blond hair says.

"Whatever, Huxley," Serena says. "He can have his fun."

"Who the heck are those guys?" Huxley asks.

"Some friends." Raye replies. She looks like she hates me.

"DIE, EVIL NEGAVERSE HUMANOIDS! DIE!" Pilot jumps onto Malachite, and I grab Jedite's crowbar. Where did he get that, anyways?

"HEY! You get offa Malachite, you crazy half-witted brat!" I scream. I can't think straight now.

"Gimme THAT!" Jedite snaps the crowbar from my hands so fast that my hands are cut up. Ow!

"What the heck?! Ow!"

SLAP SLAP

"Zee blood is on zee face! I vill draw zat!" Pilot says, in the phoniest French accent ever.

"FAKER! NO FRENCH PERSON ACTUALLY SOUNDS LIKE THAT!" I yell.

"Wanna play Sailor V vs. Lord Business vs. Jason vs. Darth Vader vs. Ashton Kutcher?" Mina asks. She saw that on the table. Who the heck is Ashton Kutcher? Or Lord Business? I know who Jason is, he's a guy who cuts off people's heads in a totally unrealistic movie. Multiple, actually. And who doesn't know who Darth Vader is?! (BOTH OF THOSE ARE 70'S & 80'S MOVIES)

Obviously I missed a lot when I was in the Negaverse

For 3 years, but I guess I liked watching 70's & 80's movies.

"That game is a week late from Awesome Video! Don't you remember what happened last time you had an overdue game from there?!" Huxley says, exasperated.

"Well, what's the worst that could happen, anyways? It's not like an inter-dimensional hit-man debt collector is gonna come and kill us. I've suffered worse," Jedite says.

"Aaa! Don't say that! You'll jinx it, and and next thing we know, inter-dimensional hit-man debt collector's gonna come!" Malachite shakes Jedite like he was a…thing your supposed to shake.

"Those don't exist." Serena says. If she's saying that…

BOOM

"I am an inter-dimensional hit-man debt collector." The fire-trucking Grim Reaper breaks through a wall in a fire-trucking Deathbot 2000. Ha ha ha.

"Hey, Grim Reaper dude. This REALLY isn't your usual line of work!" Neflite yells. "Unless, of course, it's our time to die, then this IS your usual line of work. And I don't really think so!"

"You have a fine for not returning Sailor V vs. Lord Business vs. Jason vs. Darth Vader vs. Ashton Kutcher, and it's over a week late." Grim Reaper says.

"What's the fine? I'll pay it!" Pilot says.

"YOUR LIVES!"

"Aw, shiitake mushrooms! I thought that we weren't gonna die today!" Serena says.

"Bleh! I hate shiitake mushrooms!" Mina yells.

"Well, ya don't have to kill us! It's just an overdue game! We can just pay a regular fine, ok?" I am the second-biggest IDIOT in the whole fire-trucking world. (The biggest idiot is Neflite. Duh.)

"Zoycite, you can't bargain with death! Idiot!" Raye yells.

SHICK

Carpet.

CHOMP

Table.

"Swords and claws not working, eh? Time to bring out the big guns!" Grim says.

ZAP

In the place of the telephone is now a banana. God, is he gonna turn us all into bananas?!

"Haha! Witness my inter-dimensional replacement ray! It takes any object from one dimension and replaces it with another object!" That's dumb. If ya want our lives, take our lives HERE, where there are forensic police and the FBI and the local Police, not in a crazy fire-trucking other dimension, where, for all we know, it could be a land ruled by criminals who have at least 10 kills a week! So we did the smart thing: Hide behind the couch.

ZAP

"You guys aren't gonna last very long behind that!" We turn around, and in the place of the couch is a marble. No, I think not.

ZAP

Aw, crud.

DUN DUN DUN

* * *

**I won't continue this until I get an opinion on this story.**


End file.
